The day is approaching, the day my life changed forever. The memory of that day is etched in my mind. It’s like it was yesterday. I see it much clearer as years pass. The sadness never leaves. I’ve changed so much, I’m not the same person I was on that day. I had to change in order to survive it. I had to move forward and continue to do so. There are those who don’t understand me. They haven’t been through what I have. They will understand when it happens to them. There is no escaping it. It’s inevitable. I never thought it would happen to me but it did. It’s not a situation that you can control. You have no power to stop it. And at the time you can’t believe it’s happening but it is. All you can do is hang on and try to move forward. It will consume you if you let it, but you mustn’t. Grief is ever changing. Just grab hold and hang on. I thought Troy was going to make it, the meds were working and he was finally moved to a room. The doctor said he should be able to go home in a few days. I was not prepared for what followed but then how do you prepare yourself to lose the person whose been in your life since you were 16. Your other half. You can’t, you just watch everything happening and you can’t stop the ride and get off.
Jane is a Widow 