Jane is a Widow

I hope you can find your tribe if you are dealing with widowhood. I’ve got so many widow friends who are there for me and they understand what I am dealing with right now. They can offer so much support and advice. I’m not the only person who has dealt with this. There are so many things that you deal with and you are so vulnerable. There are decisions I made that I wish I could redo but I can control future decisions I make.

People are so different than we were in the 70’s. We loved one another and there was really no room for hate. We respected each other and accepted one another. I received a message the other day from someone telling me what a beautiful person they are and if I will just change my ideology I would be accepted by them. I don’t want to be like you, no thanks, people like you are too full of hate for those who are different.

Watching this crazy hurricane that is headed for Tampa Bay. Pray that everyone stays safe. I’ve been wanting to move there but when weather like this happens there I start thinking about the hill country, my happy place.

I was thinking about all my widowed friends today, hoping that they are remembering to just breathe every day, just take it one step at a time. I was thinking back to the day Troy passed and how I was suddenly thrown into this fog and lost my way. I didn’t know which way to go, and I put so much trust in people that they were looking out for me. But as the years passed, I saw that they weren’t. When the fog lifted as the second year started, I was suddenly hit in the face with reality. And as each year has passed, I’ve seen that things haven’t been like I thought they were. People weren’t looking out for me, they were looking out for themselves. I’ve learned so much, I doubt that I will ever trust anyone again. People can put on different faces for who they want to be depending on what it is they want. They can discard you in an instant. I could never do that to someone, I have more integrity than that. I could not hurt someone like that, but hey that’s ME.

I’ve been reading the book I bought and it’s quite eye opening. There were signs all along the way but they were subtle. I remember Troy mentioning to me the pictures on more than one occasion. There weren’t any of us.

I received my book in the mail yesterday and I’ve only read a few pages but it’s so eye opening as to what’s going on. The author has been there done that and it’s so enlightening to read about someone dealing with exactly what you are.

here in Texas. I’d rather deal with the heat instead of the cold. We are working on deciding what it is we want to do. A RV sounds like such a great choice. Stay tuned.

Yesterday I read a very interesting article that continued the saga of Meghan Markle. She has asked for a visit with Prince Charles but according to the author Prince Charles went well out of his way to help with the marriage of Meghan and Harry. Now fast forward she wants to speak with him after she trashed him and his family, it looks like your and Harry’s boat has sailed. That’s what happens to those who deceive and lie about others. So don’t ever think that your family is the only one that has people in it that like to cause trouble and drama. Just remember life is too short to even let it take up space in your life. Unfortunately there are delusional people in this world.